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Pique and Shakira

OK since hard-nosed football analysis isn't what the public seems to want, here's a photo of FC Barca's Gerard Pique and Shakira.

England shows their stupidity once again

OK so England is cruising into Euro 2012 mostly because, how could they not in a ridiculous group with a team full of Premiership footballers. But the idea that Fabio Capello can get them to play like Barcelona is beyond far-fetched.

Even stupider was the suggestion that England actually looked like FC Barca in their 2-0 win over Wales over the weekend. Said Jack Wilshere: "We watched some videos of Barcelona and the way they pressed. We tried to do it like them today. We pressed high and the idea was to get some early goals and we got them."

Please, England. When you finish behind one of football's lesser lights, the United States, in your World Cup group and get thrashed out of the tournament in your first knockout match, DO NOT - we repeat DO NOT - invoke the word 'Barcelona' in any talk about your footballing style.

Stick to talking about your powerhouse Prem teams like Sunderland and Stoke City instead since that's closer to where you really are.

Some hope for the USA

After a thoroughly depressing first half, TBG found some sunshine in the second half of Saturday night's featured game on this blog, the United States' thrilling 1-1 draw with Lionel Messi-powered Argentina.

Let's start with the negative - the first 45 minutes. The 4-5-1 with Altidore 'leading the line' clearly is an idiotic idea for a number of reasons. First, Altidore does dumb things like try to take on three top-level defenders rather than hold up play so that's a problem. Second of all, it forces any competent defense not to have any threat to worry about since he never has support. And thirdly, it creates the defensive shell that we saw the entire first half that showed that the United States was simply too scared of the moment and their opponents, allowing Messi to run wild.

Look Messi is going run wild no matter what, why try to contain him? When he has the ball, you will have to have three or four guys running to him in whatever system you employ so why adopt a defensive shape? Especially in a friendly where a result is meaningless, and you should be trying to play football.

Now the second half was a different story after the introduction of Red Bulls wunderkind Juan Agudelo and 1. FC Nurnberg defender Timothy Chandler. Chandler, of course, needs no introduction to you loyal blog readers. We spotlighted him back in February so check the archives.

The 20-year-old Chandler, who is still learning English, had no trouble replacing the incompetent Jonathan Spector. Why is that? Because Chandler showed what every German wing back learns - how to push up and support the attack, and how to get in your crosses. That's what flank play in Germany is all about and it's why we at TBG love the Bundesliga, the world's most diverse league.

And Agudelo actually was not scared to be playing the mighty Messi and Argentina unlike most of the U.S. vets. Besides his fortuitous goal, Agudelo made a nice run at the near post on a cross by Chandler and also got his head on the ball on another one at the far post.

What the U.S. showed in the second half was that they could play Argentina fairly well and fairly even when they actually mounted an attack. It's a lesson to all you budding football coaches that offense can be your best defense. Sure, the field got stretched at times and Angel Dimaria missed a sitter. But there is something to be said for the fact that Argentina did not score after the break.

How do you replace Thierry Henry? You turn to Penn State!

The Red Bulls are in dire straits this weekend with at least five starters out due to the international break. Thierry Henry is out with a hamstring injry, meanwhile.

The Red Bulls have no good forwards available since Juan Agudelo is playing for the U.S. against Argentina. That means coach Hans Backe will probably use English reject Luke Rodgers and rookie Corey Hertzog.

That means Thierry Henry, who had an illustrious career with Arsenal in the English Premier League and won a World Cup with France and is known worldwide, is being replaced by ....

Corey Hertzog, a rookie fresh out of Penn State.

So some guy from Penn State is replacing Thierry Henry. Only in MLS, folks.

Annoying international break

So with the races in domestic leagues in Europe heating up as well as Europa League and the Champions League, now we get a break for international fixtures.

Let's see - does anyone care that Germany is playing Kazakhstan. Does anyone want to watch Wales without Gareth Bale take on England. Is France-Luxembourg really necessary?

When your 'top-of-the-table' clashes include Spain v. Czech Republic, Netherlands-Hungary and Italy-Slovenia and, oh yeah, Russia v. Armenia, you know that maybe, just maybe you may want to watch MLS instead - if not just for the laughs.

TBG will be focusing on the friendly between Argentina and USA solely because of the States' new red uniforms.

MLS predictions

We here at the TBG know the season has already started but one week shouldn't affect the quality (or lackthereof) of our MLS predictions. Remember last season before the playoffs, we correctly predicted that Colorado would win the Cup. So here we go ...

East

1. New York - As Alicia Keyes sings it 'There's nothin' you can't do. Now you're in New York.' Apparently except win an MLS title for one of the world's most cursed franchises. Still, NY is the team to watch in the East.

2. Sporting KC - This team can ball with Mexican superstar Omar Bravo and Kei Kamara. Plus opponents will be laughing at the new name.

3. New England - Last season was a disaster for the Revs. Expect Nicol to get this bunch to play better D with some French imports providing the key. A training-camp scuffle in the preseason showed how much fight the Revs have in them.

4. D.C. - That's right, the boys from the nation's capital are back. Ben Olsen wears D.C. pride on his sleeves and TBG expects RFK Stadium to become a fortress again. Perry Kitchen is a name to watch.

5. Houston - Everything went wrong for this once-proud franchise last season. This season, things will go wrong some of the time.

6. Philadelphia - Le Toux is Le Verite (the truth, for you non-French speakers) for the Union but there's not a whole lot else going on for this franchise which thinks it can reach the Red Bulls' level in its own mind.

7. Columbus - TBG thinks that Rogers and company are headed for a big fall.

8. Chicago - We'll say this for the Fire - they lead MLS in Uruguayans!

9. TFC - Clearly Canada's second-best team and more than likely the worst in the entire MLS.


West

1. Los Angeles - In a league with very little talent, LA has at least a few professional-caliber players and that makes all the difference.

2. RSL - Possibly the best team in MLS, RSL should excel once more.

3. Colorado - The defending champs have possibly the best strike force in the league and the best home-field advantage, but seem to be missing something in the midfield.

4. FC Dallas - A solid workmanlike club that should reach the playoffs before crashing out.

5. San Jose - Wonderboy Wondolowski gives San Jose a fighting chance to sneak into the postseason.

6. Seattle FC - Maybe the best place to watch an MLS game but not a team to watch this season.

7. Chivas USA - A team that should struggle on the defensive end.

8. Portland - Some viable MLS vets here in Kenny Cooper, Sal Zizzo and Troy Perkins.

9. Vancouver - Jay DeMerit finished in last in the Prem with Watford so he should be accustomed to this.


Playoffs:

New wild-card round:

FC Dallas over Seattle
DC over San Jose

Conference semis:

East: FC Dallas over NY
KC over New England

West: LA over DC
Colorado over RSL

Conference championships:

East: KC over FC Dallas

West: Colorado over LA

MLS Cup 2011:

Sporting KC 1, Colorado 0

Australia-India, Part 2

Regular followers of this blog know that TBG covered extensively the Australia-India Asian Cup match back in January, won by the Aussies 4-0. You can go back to our archives for that coverage.

Although this blog is solely about the beautiful game, we felt loyal readers may want to know that the two countries are gearing up to face each other in the Cricket World Cup quarter-finals on Thursday. Australia are three-time defending champs.

Will India gain revenge on the cricket pitch for the humiliating loss in football? You'll have to check out another blog to find out since, as stated above, our focus is solely on The Beautiful Game.

Bundesliga Matchday 27 review

Friday night

Mönchengladbach v. 1. FC Kaiserslautern

Prediction: 2-1
Actual result: 0-1

OK, enough on thinking Gladbach can do anything positive - ever.

Saturday

Eintracht Frankfurt v. FC St. Pauli

Prediction: 0-0
Actual result: 2-1

This one really puts the heat on St. Pauli now.

SC Freiburg v. Bayern München

Prediction: 2-1
Actual result: 1-2

This is 3 for 3 in predicting the wrong result.

Hamburger SV v. 1. FC Koln

Prediction: 1-2
Actual result: 6-2

Make it 4 for 4! Has any team anywhere given up six and scored six in successive matches?

Hannover 96 FC v. 1899 Hoffenheim

Prediction: 2-1
Actual result: 2-0

Hannover's pursuit of third spot is still on course.

1. FC Nürnberg v. Werder Bremen

Prediction: 2-2
Actual result: 1-3

Bremen want no part of a relegation battle.

Borussia Dortmund v. FSV Mainz 05

Prediction: 3-1
Actual result: 1-1

Will these dropped points hurt the 'champions-elect?'

Sunday

Bayer Leverkusen v. FC Schalke 04

Prediction: 1-1
Actual result: 2-0

Schalke are not near the drop but they are playing like they should be.

VfB Stuttgart v. VfL Wolfsburg

Prediction: 2-1
Actual result: 1-1

TBG believes this was a good point for the Wolves, who have a couple weeks off to sort out their numerous problems.

Bundesliga Matchday 27 predictions

Friday night

Mönchengladbach v. 1. FC Kaiserslautern

Prediction: 2-1

If Gladbach have any hope to survive, three points in the Friday night showcase match are a must.

Saturday

Eintracht Frankfurt v. FC St. Pauli

Prediction: 0-0

Another relegation six-pointer should provide a share of the spoils for these awful clubs.

SC Freiburg v. Bayern München

Prediction: 2-1

Bayern are falling apart quickly while the infighting continues. Freiburg are poor themselves but may be more motivated.

Hamburger SV v. 1. FC Koln

Prediction: 1-2

The mood is also sour at HSV, while Koln have been simply outstanding.

Hannover 96 FC v. 1899 Hoffenheim

Prediction: 2-1

Hannover have been high flyers at home and need to bounce back after last weekend's embarrassing defeat.

1. FC Nürnberg v. Werder Bremen

Prediction: 2-2

Nurnberg are playing very well, but Bremen seem to have plenty of fight in them as well. This is one to watch.

Borussia Dortmund v. FSV Mainz 05

Prediction: 3-1

Klopp should have his men ready against his former team. Mainz's pressing style is not an ideal way to attack Dortmund.

Sunday

Bayer Leverkusen v. FC Schalke 04

Prediction: 1-1

Rangnick has a tough first match with the Royal Blues.

VfB Stuttgart v. VfL Wolfsburg

Prediction: 2-1

This is another unlikely relegation six-pointer. Hard to see Magath having an impact on the toothless Wolves this year.

Coaching Changes in Germany

Well Felix Magath won't have to wait long for a new job. Fired from Schalke, he will take over at Wolfsburg. Remember Magath led the Wolves to the title two years ago and guided the Royal Blues into the last eight of the Champions League this year. Of course, that was not good enough for the pathetic supporters of Schalke.

Ralf Rangnick, let go by Dietmar Hopp from Hoffenheim, will take over the mess at Schalke. He's got some work to do because TBG believes the Royal Blues will draw FC Barcelona in the Champions League when the draw is announced.

Rock Bottom for Bayern

It's a shock to the system as Bayern Munchen have turned in an Arsenal-like campaign this season. No trophies for them after a truly wasteful night in Munich in a 3-2 loss to Inter Milan. The champions advance after Bayern waste opportunity after opportunity to move on through in truly a pathetic turn of events.

Bayern Munchen have disgraced themselves and their supporters with their useless finishing ability.

Champions League predictions

Two big matches in Champions League are set for Tuesday. First the JV game as Manchester United take on Marseille in England after a scoreless draw in France. The result means that the French side only need a score draw to eliminate United. Said iconic legendary brilliant coach Sir Alex Ferguson: "The focus is on Marseille because they are a good team. It’s a European match, a night game, and it’s at Old Trafford – all these things work in our favour. Hopefully we get the result that we want."

Since Brandao won't be making the trip for the French side due to rape allegations, this one should be easy.

PREDICTION: Manchester United 2, Marseille 0

In the game that all of Europe is abuzz over, European champions Inter visit the Allianz Arena to take on Bayern München. The Germans won 1-0 on the road through Mario Gomez so a draw is enough. Inter will advance if they score two, and ironically they won 2-0 in last year's final - a sufficient scoreline this time around.

Said Inter boss Leonardo: "The first leg could have produced a different result, so it would be no surprise if Inter won this one. Tomorrow night we'll be starting on level terms and I'm optimistic because I know the strength and spirit of this group."

Bayern prepared by ruthlessly dismantling a pathetic Hamburger SV side 6-0 this past weekend. They are ready to put up more goals in front of a raucous home crowd.

Said Bayern's Bastian Schweinsteiger: "In my opinion, we’ll prove to be the better side over two games."

Inter are the only Italian side still in European competition. Germany still have three teams left - Bayern, Leverkusen and Schalke.

PREDICTION: Bayern München 3, Inter Milan 0

Bundesliga Matchday 26 review

Friday night

1. FC Koln v. Hannover 96 FC

Prediction: 2-1
Actual result: 4-0

As predicted here, FC Koln is for real.

Saturday

1. FC Kaiserslautern v. SC Freiburg

Prediction: 1-1
Actual result: 2-1

This victory for Kaiserslautern has added plenty of intrigue to the relegation battle.

Bayern München v. Hamburger SV

Prediction: 3-1
Actual result: 6-0

How's that for a response with Inter coming in? Veh said he's never been beaten 6-0 as coach - he won't get another chance for Hamburg since he's gone.

FC Schalke 04 v. Eintracht Frankfurt

Prediction: 2-0
Actual result: 2-1

Frankfurt finally score! Alas it did not matter.

VfL Wolfsburg v. 1. FC Nürnberg

Prediction: 1-2
Actual result: 1-2

A stoppage-time winner for Nilsson and Der Klube.

1899 Hoffenheim v. Borussia Dortmund

Prediction: 0-2
Actual result: 1-0

TBG believes Dortmund are entitled to a banana skin for once.

Werder Bremen v. Mönchengladbach

Prediction: 4-1
Actual result: 1-1

Favre's men battle for one point through Dante in the 90th, adding spice to the relegation mix.

Sunday

FSV Mainz 05 v. Bayer Leverkusen

Prediction: 2-2
Actual result: 0-1

Leverkusen's meisterschaft deficit is down to nine points?!

FC St. Pauli v. VfB Stuttgart

Prediction: 1-2
Actual result: 1-2

As predicted, the Swabians took care of business near the Reeperbahn.

Great coaching move

Mainz is one of the surprises of European football with their electric play. It seems coach Thomas Tuchel's unusual training methods are a big reason why. He claims he used a psychological trick against Hamburg last weekend.

Mainz trailed 1-0 on a goal which should not have been given. So during his half-time team talk, he reminded his players about training camp in the winter when he intentionally upset half of his team by making them walk over a mile from the training pitch to the hotel, despite the fact they had beaten the other half in a penalty shoot-out competition.

The test was designed to see how the players responded to injustices - like the one last weekend - and to help them overcome such moments. "Every single whistle against the players or every foul which is not given, or is unfairly given, releases a feeling of injustice among the players," he explained. "The point of that exercise was to see how the players reacted and give them a reference point for them to remember back to. I reminded them of this at half-time."

Credit Tuchel for being a terrific motivator - it's great coaching like this that helps make the Bundesliga is great.

Bundesliga Matchday 26 predictions

Friday night

1. FC Koln v. Hannover 96 FC

Prediction: 2-1

Hannover are flying high, but a trip to the Rheinenergie may bring them back to Earth.

Saturday

1. FC Kaiserslautern v. SC Freiburg

Prediction: 1-1

Still no wins for Kaiserslautern since the break, and Freiburg are slumping badly. Hard to see a winner.

Bayern München v. Hamburger SV

Prediction: 3-1

A week without matches should clear Bayern's minds. Hamburg can't be expected to show up in the wake of Veh ripping into the club.

FC Schalke 04 v. Eintracht Frankfurt

Prediction: 2-0

A rousing win over Valencia in Champions League showed Schalke's quality, and Frankfurt are still searching for their first goal of 2011.

VfL Wolfsburg v. 1. FC Nürnberg

Prediction: 1-2

Der Klube are quietly unbeaten in their last four on the road and looking like a European contender while the Wolves have been awful.

1899 Hoffenheim v. Borussia Dortmund

Prediction: 0-2

The 'champions-elect' should cruise.

Werder Bremen v. Mönchengladbach

Prediction: 4-1

One of the more disappointing defeats for 'Gladbach was at home to Bremen. Expect a similarly comprehensive loss Saturday.

Sunday

FSV Mainz 05 v. Bayer Leverkusen

Prediction: 2-2

Leverkusen may have thrown away their Europa League campaign against Villarreal. Mainz are on the front foot. This one should be a classic.

FC St. Pauli v. VfB Stuttgart

Prediction: 1-2

A relegation six-pointer should go in the Swabians' favor due to the injury crisis at the Millentor.

Barcelona vs. Arsenal

Let's make one thing clear, the better team today and everyday is Barcelona.  When you go 90 minutes without attempting a shot on goal, you do not deserve to win.  Arsenal had three major plays today:  Arsenal's back heel pass, RVP's red card, and Bendtner's first touch on that pass from Wilshere late in the game.  We can debate until we're blue in the face, if those went the other way . . .

Let's discuss Barcelona's play.  That first goal was pure beauty.  The Iniesta pass to Messi was better than threading a needle.  There were Arsenal players all around him.  Then in a split second, Messi had the presence of mind to chip the ball over the goalie and to himself.  1-0 Barcelona

Then there's the string of passes from Iniesta to Villa to Xavi for the second goal.  That was all one touch football with Arsenal defenders all around again.  The ball moved before the defenders could react.  The quality and timing was unmatched.




So we can harp on the "what ifs", but the truth is Barcelona was superior in all phases of the game.

Bundesliga Matchday 25 review

Friday night

Borussia Dortmund v. 1. FC Koln

Prediction: 2-1
Actual result: 1-0

Rensing with a superb effort for Koln, but not enough to stop Klopp's men from maintaining their advantage.

Saturday

Eintracht Frankfurt v. 1. FC Kaiserslautern

Prediction: 1-1
Actual result: 0-0

We suppose it was too much to ask Frankfurt to score, and too much to expect Kaiserslautern to draw level on points.

VfB Stuttgart v. FC Schalke 04

Prediction: 3-1
Actual result: 1-0

Will Magath be gone although the Royal Blues can still achieve a Cup double?

Mönchengladbach v. 1899 Hoffenheim

Prediction: 1-2
Actual result: 2-0

Just when you think Borussia are done, they drag you back into believing with an unlikely clean sheet.

Hannover 96 FC v. Bayern München

Prediction: 1-2
Actual result: 3-1

Van Gaal is 'Van Gone' after this season. Will Bayern be gone from the Champions League as well?

1. FC Nürnberg v. FC St. Pauli

Prediction: 2-0
Actual result: 5-0

No Asamosh is no excuse for this dreadful effort as Eigler scored four.

Bayer Leverkusen v. VfL Wolfsburg

Prediction: 3-1
Actual result: 3-0
The Wolves truly don't know the meaning of the word defense.

Sunday

SC Freiburg v. Werder Bremen

Prediction: 2-2
Actual result: 1-3

Bremen move out of the drop with this unlikely effort after being outscored 20-1 over their previous seven road fixtures.

Hamburger SV v. FSV Mainz 05

Prediction: 1-1
Actual result: 2-4

Mainz vault over Bayern into fourth with a flurry of second-half goals that buried Hamburg.

Bundesliga Matchday 25 predictions

Friday night

Borussia Dortmund v. 1. FC Koln

Prediction: 2-1

If Dortmund are to slip up, this would be a spot for it to happen. But we believe they will manage to get the three points over Frank Schaefer's men.

Saturday

Eintracht Frankfurt v. 1. FC Kaiserslautern

Prediction: 1-1

A win for Kaiserslautern would leave these sides level on points and drag Eintracht into the relegation battle. Surely Frankfurt will finally score, right?

VfB Stuttgart v. FC Schalke 04

Prediction: 3-1

Have to believe Schalke won't have much incentive after the midweek win at Bayern while Stuttgart finally are showing signs of life.

Mönchengladbach v. 1899 Hoffenheim

Prediction: 1-2

Favre won his first home match but last week showed that was a fluke.

Hannover 96 FC v. Bayern München

Prediction: 1-2

The champions are on thin ice after two straight defeats, but Hannover are without Didier Ya Konan so they should find it tough to find goals.

1. FC Nürnberg v. FC St. Pauli

Prediction: 2-0

Nürnberg are a club that may earn a European spot in the final reckoning.

Bayer Leverkusen v. VfL Wolfsburg

Prediction: 3-1

Leverkusen have been piling up plenty of goals, and that trend should continue against the Wolves' toothless D.

Sunday

SC Freiburg v. Werder Bremen

Prediction: 2-2

Freiburg have started to stutter, and Bremen simply need the three points more. This is a hard fixture to determine.

Hamburger SV v. FSV Mainz 05

Prediction: 1-1

Hamburg have a chance to draw level with Mainz for fifth place in what should be an entertaining affair.

Bundesliga Matchday 24 review

Friday night

VfL Wolfsburg v. Mönchengladbach

Prediction: 1-2
Actual result: 2-1

Note to self - never predict a Gladbach victory again - ever.

Saturday

1. FC Kaiserslautern v. Hamburger SV

Prediction: 2-1
Actual result: 1-1

Looks like HSV did well to get a point here.

1. FC Koln v. SC Freiburg

Prediction: 2-2
Actual result: 1-0

TBG expected goals and a draw, and instead we got an 88th-minute winner from Podolski.

FC Schalke 04 v. 1. FC Nürnberg

Prediction: 2-1
Actual result: 1-1

We suppose it's too much to ever expect Schalke to do anything in the league - so expect them to win the DfB-Pokal and advance in Champions League now.

FC St. Pauli v. Hannover 96

Prediction: 0-2
Actual result: 0-1

Big Bayern showdown looms for Hannover if they want to be serious about Champions League.

1899 Hoffenheim v. FSV Mainz 05

Prediction: 2-1
Actual result: 1-2

Now Mainz goes out and looks like their old selves!

Bayern München v. Borussia Dortmund

Prediction: 1-1
Actual result: 1-3

See previous blog entry.

Sunday

Eintracht Frankfurt v. VfB Stuttgart

Prediction: 0-0
Actual result: 0-2

Predicting no goals for Frankfurt never goes wrong - even up a man for 74 minutes!

Werder Bremen v. Bayer Leverkusen

Prediction: 1-3
Actual result: 2-2

Speaking of teams that may not be serious about Champions League, see Leverkusen after throwing away a two-goal lead.

Jurgen Klopp's Broken Glasses

Here at TBG, we made mention of Uli Hoeness's prediction that Bayern would beat runaway leaders Dortmund by at leat 'two clear goals.' Captain Philipp Lahm said: "It's out of question that we will lose this match."

Which brings us to Dortmund coach Jurgen Klopp's glasses, the spectacles he studiously displays while he guides one of Europe's most exciting sides. It was during a wild celebration on the pitch after Dortmund's thorough 3-1 dismantling of the champions that Klopp's specs were broken, with one of the lenses cutting into his skin after a collision with top midfielder Nuri Sahin.

Said Klopp: "Nuri is allowed to do that. And the new glasses are much nicer anyway."

It's fair to say new glasses will be ordered for Klopp every matchday if he conjures up more performances like Saturday's. Dortmund's pressing nullified Bayern's possession edge, turning Arjen Robben and Franck Ribery into pub players just days after they ran riot against European champion Inter.

Said Louis Van Gaal: "Dortmund’s pressing game was superb. We may not have been fresh enough, and we certainly weren’t smart enough."

With an average age of 22.7 years, Dortmund have shown that fresh legs and disciplined pressing are the way to go. And this comprehensive win came without TBG favorite Shinji Kagawa and injured goalkeeper Roman Weidenfeller.

We'll leave the last word to Dortmund head honcho Hans-Joachim Watzke, who aptly said, "Games are not won with words, but with the feet."

They are also won with a clear vision, even when it's through broken glasses.